after coming back to Japan, i have been super busy and have changed so much!
first of all, i met a tall Turkish guy, and somehow we started to hung out and it was full of excitement to know about the guy with many experiences. My mind blew off. I was in love.. he was different from others in many ways. for example, how to say,,,,, he does not show his affection to me and always kidding like elementally school boy. Not satisfied! i made lots of effort to live in Tokyo caz i supposed to live in Osaka. I believed he is " the Destiny Guy." with my latest ex, i could not think of being with him forever caz he did not have enough money! no, im kidding,, he did not have capacity to understand more widely. he was still baby:S
But this guy ! i could throw all barriers at once somehow, i could be free from fears. but it turned into so badly.. he didnt show me enough affection and he always lie about stupid things and made fun of me. i became his pet or something. also, my world was occupied by him because I MoVed in TOkyo for HIM !!
I stared to miss my sweetest ex and had contacted and made him come by making out in front of video chat which made me not exciting at all. anyway, i needed to get somehow attention and care from someone who realllly loves me ... i know who i was.. me and my ex had no future together but it works sometimes especially when both of us feel lonely.
anyway i was about to break up with "the destiny guy." i could not bear what he is and how he treated me. i had all supports from friends too! yes, i said to him to break up! he said wow wow i gonna break up with u caz u cheated on me! u pretended to a good girl. no way! u lied and cheated ! he won the game.
FUck!! but i felt reallly reallly fu#kin bad. I was in love with him n I tried my best but in the end, why I became a loser !? why I was the only bad caz i did internet sex!? yeah i just typed in whatever to make him satisfied. believe or not, i am not interested in internet sexual conversation at all, that totally turned me off.
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