distance

Tokyo to Turkey ! we could overcome easily if we try to keep in touch and believe each other. that was my "long distance love theory." guess what? he did destroy the common theory for long distance love. first, he borrowed money from me and his friend who is my friend as well and did small good bye dinner before he went. Then he went back to Turkey. He could call me at least when he arrived. he didnt. he told me to call him but when he is available. i had to make sure before i call him if he could talk to me and if it not, he does not know when he could talk.


the worst thing i ever experienced was when i called him by international phone call, if he was not available, he hung off without saying anything when he knows it is me. he could say hold on, call me back blah blah blah- anyway right? the reason why he doesnt say anything is only he does not feel comfortable to talk when he is with his family. WTF

how do i want solve these stresses!? to where?!

i know readers could think then why cant u break up with him?

i know i know i know ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,but i cant ,,,,, dont know why

i waited for two months almost , being treated like shit. his friends say he is a good person.  my first impression was okay as well. if i give it up right now, i am so disappointed in myself. u know why my pride would be destroyed. i should get reword for it.  i will not give up until he comes back and see things clearly.

i hate myself now being like shit. why cant i move on!?